I was once a creative writer and being one got me nowhere. I did write a novel complete and it lies abandoned on some old computer around my palace. In an anteroom perhaps? In a closet on one of the stone towers of my castle? I do not know. I mention this as I am old and typos-are-us is on all my websites. As is poor grammar on occasion but I always decide, after fumbling with my keyboard, to come back and correct my errors of speech. A comma here or one erased there, so to speak. I am not a high flying person. I am down to earth and that is where I belong. No visions of grandeur just toiling here or toiling there until God says, “Enough!” Then, you will find typos not cleaned up after a few days and know: that old SOB finally kicked the bucket and demonstrate a washing of hands in the air like Mac Beth. “Out damned spot!” “Old Fart,” whatever.
I don’t plan to kick off any time soon as I am having a great time watching idiots. Idiots are typos of the human race aren’t they? No, not in reality but figuratively speaking. Don’t be so dammed literal, OK? I am one who is not two. Not two persons and not of two minds. I make up my mind and go for it and: “Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead!” (Gridley) Yeah, I read a lot and I have five sets of eyeglasses to prove it!
Edits are what this country needs. See how I wove the title of this article in? Only old farts can do this with aplomb and a decent grasp of the English language. I won’t write in French because I never bothered to learn a new language. Why the hell should I speak two languages? For my ego’s sake? I don’t have an ego to speak of because I kicked it out when it talked back to me. Damnedest thing, that.Unexpected and scared the livin’ daylight out of me.
You will notice that I start a subject, digress, then cleverly weave it all back at the end of an article . . . to fool you into thinking that I actually made sense. To each his own. To her, a wealthy husband.To the dog, don’t pee on the carpet, ya lout! I love cats only because they think for themselves and wag their tail when they’re annoyed. Long live cats of all sizes and shapes from the Sierra -Nevada’s to the African plain. Good day and happy fourth to you. See you tomorrow?
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